Jonathan

Two men wearing, what I would refer to as fur-lined deer stalkers, but the internet informs me are more properly called Ushankas, are standing on the pavement.  'Sorry to disturb you', I begin.  'It's not that disturbing', says one, whose hands are in the pockets on his jacket.  He has a moustache.  'Try us out'.  I explain my resolution.

'Eliminated', says his companion, on whose pointed nose sits a pair of wire-rimmed spectacles.  He tells me he has just had it removed from his passport.  'I didn't chose it and I didn't like it', he says.  He looks towards the man with his hands in his pockets.

'It's not Jennifer', he says.  I say that I assumed it wasn't.  'Someone's middle name is Jennifer', he says.  I agree that it is likely (in fact Tuesday 10th April confirms it) but tell him that doesn't help my present cause.  With a sigh, he gives me an answer.  His companion is surprisingly surprised.  'Is it?' he asks.  It is cold and I leave them to their discussion.

(The Ushanka hat as we know it today dates from Russia during the Second World War.  The fur ear flaps can be tied up to the crown of the cap or below the chin to protect the ears, jaw and lower chin from the cold.  Wikipedia points out that the fur also offers 'some protection against blunt impacts to the head'.)